Sunday, December 11, 2005

Overcoming Anxiety

"Anxiety in a man's heart weighs it down,
But a good word makes it glad." Proverbs 12:25

I realize that I have to be able to give these "good words" to myself. What I tell myself either encourages or discourages. The effect is is clearly felt in my heart, either way.

The book I have been reading, "Don't Panic" by R. Reid Wilson, Ph.D. talks about developing within onself, a supportive observer.
This new inner voice :
  • "reminds me of my freedoms and choices"
  • "gives me permission to feel safe"
  • "supports all my efforts"
  • "invites me to feel confident"
  • "trusts me and lets me trust myself"
  • "expects a postive future"
  • "points out my successes"
  • "looks around me for support"
  • "believes that I can change"
Over the years, people have told me, "Don't be so hard on yourself." I understand, now, that they didn't mean that I shouldn't be honest with myself about my weaknesses but that I was too harsh with myself about them. Wilson refers to these voices as negative observers-worried, critical or hopeless. My negative obervers are the worried and critical type.

My soul desires honesty, gentleness and kindness from someone very important to me. Myself.

6 comments:

David said...

as direector of our Marching maniacs, carol, you are a genius. I have taken up the title and position of Right Flank Honor guard to help keep order in the ranks. Holding my rifle on my shoulder and calling out a happy marching song, I seek to infect others with the cheer I have at the sound of marching blog feet.

Carol said...

Uh...you have heard about the gun control in Canada,right?
How about you keep a bag of snowballs over your shoulder to keep everyone in line this winter?

Rhiannon said...

Carol, maybe you and I have more in common then I realized. I do these daily affirmations to myself every day that are very similiar to the list you wrote here. I had a lot of panic attacks during my marital split up years ago. Now its much better but when under a lot of stress it will rise up sometimes and I can't let it show out in the world cause its just me myself and I, got to handle things got no back up, none whatsoever. It gets pretty scary sometimes,but I will only fall apart when I get home,then try my deep breathing in and out in and out..I also like to dance it out or do some alternative healing work that I have done on others to myself!..lol..it does help, along with music and keep telling myself "you go girl"!

The hardest part I have is my being a senstive caring person and yet trying to be tough and protecting myself at the same time. Most times its a good thing other times gets me into trouble. Sometimes people can really "stick the knife in" without even realizing how much they hurt you by their words. I'm still working on not letting that affect me. Like you said we work on trying not to be so hard on ourselves, especially if we know we are doing the very best we can...and I know you are.."You go Girl"!..:o)

Thanks for having the courage to share this with us..

With Angel whispering wings all around you,

Rhiannon

Carol said...

Thanks for sharing, Rhiannon. I hope we will continue to get to know one another.

sister celtic said...

i hear ya carol i'm always told that one that i'm too hard on myself.. so i have to join you and knock that stuff off...I WAS SO BADLY ABUSED AS A SMALL CHILD WELL INTO MY ADULT LIFE AND I'M NOT GOING TO LET IT RUIN MY LIFE IN CHRIST..HE HAS DELIVERED ME AND I ALWAYS PAY CLOSE ATTENTION TO WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS REGAURDING "satan IS THE ACCUSER OF THE BREATHERN AND STAND BEFORE GOD DAY AND NIGHTR ACCUSING US.. ROBBING AND CURSING US BEFOR GOD.. SO I RESIST THE NEED TO ALLOW THAT KIND OF SHIZAD INTO MY WONDERFUL LIFE IN CHRIST.. YOU ARE SOOO SWEET..GOD BLESS YOU THANKS FOR THE HONOR OF BEING ABLE TO MARCH WITH THE SAINTS..

Carol said...

Sister Celtic,
I hope that you will learn to resist the urge to continue the self abuse, too.
There is a need in every life for honest appraisal but to be able to give that with compassion and kindness to others and to oneself is a rare talent. One worth working towards.

You are a sweetheart, too. Let's keep visiting.