Monday, May 29, 2006

48% To Go

You Have Low Self Esteem 52% of the Time

While you sometimes feel good about yourself, you tend to struggle a little with self esteem issues.

It's not about changing who you are, it's about accepting your faults. You just need to be less critical and demanding of yourself!

How is Your Self Esteem?

I am trying to overcome this tendency. I think that considering and appreciating my strengths and talents as well as accepting or dealing with the weaknesses will help.
Any other suggestions?


Kathy said...

Hello Carol,
I got:

***You Have Low Self Esteem 8% of the Time***

Which can be translated to mean, you have high self-esteem and a healthy sense of self worth.
You believe in yourself, and you know how to be the real you. You love yourself, imperfections and all.
You asked for suggestions; perhaps this quote will help:
"Self-understanding is at least half the battle in self-transformation".  Ragip Baba

Carol said...

Thanks Kathy for the suggestion. I have always thought that I understand myself, for self-analyisis is practically my second name.
Have I missed out something?

Su said...

Hi Carol! Having 'high self-esteem' is, strictly speaking, not a Godly concept, for we are asked to esteem others (Phil 2:3) before ourselves. Having high 'self-respect', on the other hand, is very important. We need to understand who we are in Christ, created beautifully, and loved by God. Self-esteem, on the other hand, tends to lead to comparisons with others, something that we should really stay away from. You are created to be a beautiful child of God, and He wants a deep relationship with you! So, you no longer need to look at yourself in relation to anyone else, just listen to what God wants to re-shape in your life. The beautiful character of Jesus will continue to emerge from you as you dwell in 'the secret place of the Most High'(Psalm 91). Bless you.

Barbara said...

Kathy - do what I do whenever I have a problem, ask Google.

Kathy said...

I'm not following you Barbara. But yes, I do check google for a lot of information.

Raehan said...

I have low self-esteem 12% of the time.

My esteem is much better than it used to be. There's hope Low-self esteem in not necessarily an always thing.

Barbara said...

Carol - I just meant to do a Google search on "raising self-esteem". It will probably come up with a few sites that will give you some good suggestions.

Emily said...

Self esteem...I did the questionaire and got 8% of the Time too...

What are some of the answers you clicked on? Which ones would you feel you could challenge?

For example, one is about trying new things...this could be as simple as trying a dessert you've never had or reading a book you'd never try reading. It could be as challenging as going to a church with a different religion or taking a course in computer animation.

I think one of the biggest factors in my life was volunteering. It sounds silly but it really does make a difference if I go to an animal shelter and play with some dogs and bring some treats. It's a good way of forcing me out of a rut and trying new things/meeting new people.

Another one was perfectionist, I basically have realized perfection is not what it's all about. Laughing at the mistakes and seeing the humor in the attempt is what it's about.

I remember when I tried theater arts in junior college, it was the first night for a new play and everything that could go wrong did. Some of the actors where furious and ashamed...I was having a great time at the antics of the crew (the key light guy didn't show and they couldn't find the master lighting sheet). It was hilarious. Good stuff.

Find the humor in some of life and you've won half the battle. Before my 92 year old great aunt died recently, she would recount stories from her past...most of the time with a smile/laughter...even though her daughter died at 55 (from down syndrome) and she out lived two husbands! I'd say that's pretty darn good! :)

Anyway, sorry for flapping my gums (or keyboard) so much. ; )

Carol said...

Wow, thanks for the good responses!

I have heard Phil 2:3 used as an argument that we are not to esteem ourselves over others. I like the way that you emphasized the comparison.
A word study of esteem will help. I'll let you know what I find out at a later date.
I think of the command to love others as we love ourselves.

Good advice, computer whiz!

I am hoping for the same conclusion.

Thanks for the flapping excellent advice, especially to have another look at the quiz answers to see what it says my weak areas are.


Su said...

Phil 2:1-7 looks at the way we are to live and demonstrates the example of the way Jesus lived. Love for ourselves is only possible through love for God (love God 1st). Esteem for others is being aware of another's needs and making them more important than our own (ie we try our best to meet their needs, see the example of Jesus and how he truly served). Goes against the grain if we look at life from a selfish point of view :-)These days it's all 'Me, Me, Me!!'The battle of the flesh.

Imran said...

Hate to admit it, but I suffer from the same thing and have nothing to offer as a suggestion.

I learn a few suggestions here from you ladies instead. The one from Barbara is definitely good and I should try it too.

Thank you Carol for bringing this matter up.

Poetry by Kai said...

hi carol,

Lazy Daisy said...

Hi were applauded for your academic achievement for the blog olypmics best conductor. Hope you know how much you are valued and appreciated.

Carol said...

Hi Kai!

Lazy D,
You are a natural encourager, I think. Much thanks!

colleen said...

28% of the time. Is that my sister Kathy over there. I can't believe she got 8%! I forgot to read the bottom part!

Shannon said...

a friend once told me that if you try to fix your weaknesses, all you end up with are strong embrace the strengths!


Well this is really very true of ourselves. Sometimes the worst critics are ourselves. We have to be sometimes good to ourselves to give a boost to our own self esteem.

Carol said...

I am glad to see I am not alone. I was beginning to wonder.

Yep, that is your sis. You just never really know someone until you blog.

Embracing the strengths sounds good but I can't help but tinker.

Friday's Child,
I am trying but it is so hard.

Thanks for writing everyone!

Kathy said...

Yes Colleen, Carol and readers,
It's your sister Kathy here.
Imagine! I got 8%, which translates into high self esteem. Seems difficult to believe eh? I agree.

Perhaps it was the questions, as Emily suggested.
Or perhaps my experiment at Particularly Persistent Point of View in watching the fake personality* - the denied part of ourselves; ie, our inner noise/the false identiy, that works overtime to destroy our esteem, is helping me to see how negative self-talk is what pollutes our thinking and gets in the way of SEEing who really are...BEAUTIFUL creative beings in God's huge garden.

The silent watcher, who is ever present and patiently standing by, waiting for us to see our own beauty, is what this kind of observation brings into light.

I'll end with another quote that better explains:
"Watch out for any kind of defensiveness within yourself. What are you defending? An illusory identity, an image in your mind, a fictitious entity. By making this pattern conscious, by witnessing it, you disidentify from it. In the light of your consciousness, the unconscious pattern will then quickly dissolve." - by Eckhart Tolle

*whom I call Mr. Tiger

Jen said...

It said I have low self-esteem 4% of the time.

I did a LOT of therapy in high school and college, before that I was a mess. Now my mom thinks she sent me in too much, because I think I'm GREAT and everyone wants to be like me! (Ok, it's really not that bad.)

I think one of the biggest battles to overcome is realizing that you really do have something to offer that no one else does. It's not always easy to find, but you do. When you start seeing those little things, the things you do that matter and make a difference, you start to see where you fit in.

It also helps to see why you appreciate the people around you. Usually it's not because they saved your life that time in 'Nam, or they gave you a kidney, right? It's usually the little stuff that they do, the fact that they can make you laugh, or they make you feel good or whatever that makes them special to you. When you see that, you can start to see those parts of you.


Carol said...

The quote you gave by Tolle is a good reminder that not every thought is real or accurate.

Thanks Jen for sharing of your experience with the battle for self-esteem (or self-love, really)
I'm making a list!

Artpuppy872 said...

I got 48 percent of the time! I am disspointed with the result but I already knew that I didn't have high self-esteem. Everyone seems to have high self esteem. You just have to like yourself the way you are.

Carol said...

Dear Art Puppy,
I think you are a sweet young girl.

I think that our difference gives us something very special, the ability to see our weaknesses and with that comes the ability to change if we want or need to.
God bless you!

KansasSunflower said...

Cool quiz. Surprisingly, my low self esteem was only 40% of the time. Thanks for sharing that test!

Carol said...

Hi Kansassunflower,
I'm glad you enjoyed the test.
Nice to meet you!